Tuesday, February 15, 2011

As Time Goes By

I thought that it would be a good idea to wait until after Valentines Day to do my blog. The day can be fraught with so much expectation – especially for those of us in a relationship. Serious pressure to have something so fragile as a 'relationship' put through the very sharp focus of a 'Valentines Day' lens.

It wasn't too surprising then to read in the newspaper on the weekend that this is also a very busy time of the year for Private Investigators checking up on the 'fidelity' of their clients spouse. It appears that some people can't help but celebrate this day with their spouse and mistress – a bit of a gamble apparently, since it's a pretty easy catch.

For the rest of us, it is a useful time of the year to put some focus on the relationship – not limit it to commercials – and to appreciate the person who you have promised to share your life with – come hell or high water. So it is with this spirit of focus and appreciation that I started off Valentines Day with the husband.

It began with me asking for some help from him. He has recently become a bit of an expert in helping me with what we have termed 'emotional adjustments.' As a very tuned in male he has become adept at helping me sort through my emotional road map – which can get very tangled.

We chatted for a bit about various little issues that I was grappling with and then he hit the nail on the head by observing that I 'must feel quite overwhelmed at times by the onslaught of humanity – being such a sensitive and open person – no wonder you need to withdraw and remove yourself at times.' It was the best gift I could possibly receive, being seen and understood for who I am and how I am.

Later that night, we watched Casablanca – one of my favourite movies. I have seen it many times and I often have watched it, hoping the ending would be different. Yet, I think that what I most love about Casablanca is how Rick really does understand Illsa – and loves her enough to let her go and do what she needs to do.

Rick knew what he was doing when he said, 'here's looking at you kid!'

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