Monday, October 25, 2010

Saying Goodbye

I'm having a difficult time getting to my blog today. No real inspiration and a lot of sadness. I have received very sad news about a very close friend of mine. She has cancer and she has been told today it is terminal – 6months to a year to live.

For me, this is a first. I have never had a friend of mine in this position. I have of course had other people in my life – family and close family friends – who have passed away. The difference has been that they weren't my peers, she is my peer. We have known each other since high school and we have had a lot of laughs and good times together; including a trip to Italy. We have also shared many sad and difficult times; this obviously being among the most difficult.

Soul mates can be friends too – friends who share a certain soul connection, an understanding and a history that I thought would last forever. It has called me up very sharply to know that this particular friend is nearing the end of her time here with me and with everyone else who knew and loved her.

This isn't the usual kind of thing that gets posted on a blog about 'Soul Mates' but I made a commitment to write this twice a week. That means that I write it, whether I feel like it or not. I also promised myself to be authentic and write about what was in my heart and on my mind.

Today – this is what is in my heart and on my mind – the termination of a relationship through death. A tough one because it isn't the one we expect or feel any sense of control over. So for me, it is coming to grips with this passage and to make whatever plans I need to make in order to honour this relationship and give it the respect that it is due.

Time to say goodbye.


  1. I am sorry that you have to face the imminent loss of a wonderful close friend. It is a somewhat harsh reminder that we have indeed reached the stage in our lives when we will lose loved ones, just as our parents reached when we were in high school. It is hard to believe. I hope you find a meaningful way to say good-bye and perhaps ease your friend's passage into the next stage of life, the "Beyond" as per her belief and faith.

  2. Ellen, I am so very sad for the both of you. I have yet to experience this, but it will inevitably come. Thank you for letting the ones who love you share this difficult time with you. Please let me help! I am a good listener and share your compassion for people. I hope she is willing to talk about it with you and share her fears and feelings. And I'm glad she has you as her dear friend!